Maximizing the Joy of the Season with a Neurodiverse Child
Flip the calendar to any day between mid-November and early January and you can take your pick of holiday activities. There are plays and choir performances, light displays and parades, baking parties and meals with family and friends. And that’s not including gift shopping, wrapping, cards and decorating! But just because you have the opportunity to participate in all these seemingly fun activities, doesn’t mean you have to. In fact, the key to a joyous holiday – particularly for families with a neurodiverse child – may be that less is more. The lights, sounds, sweets and group gatherings that may sound so enjoyable can actually be overwhelming to those with a neurodiversity. Here’s a few tips to help maximize joy – and minimize meltdowns – this holiday season.
Involve the family in planning: Sit down as a family and discuss which activities are most important to each person.
Develop a schedule: Write down what activities you plan to attend and be sure not to schedule activities back-to-back. Also, be sure to include “chill” days to allow your child to relax without any expectations.
Outline expectations: Let your child know in advance if they need to dress up for an event, talk to members of the extended family or participate in an activity. Be sure to listen to their concerns and also to let them know what you expect from them.
Minimize sensory overload: If lights, sounds, new tastes or large groups tend to overwhelm your child, try to avoid activities that include these. For those activities that your child must attend, scout the space when you arrive and find a quiet spot where your child can take a break if they become overwhelmed.
Maintain routines: As much as possible, stick to routines that include set times to get up and go to bed, eat meals, wash up, complete chores and enjoy downtime. This will help maintain your child’s physical and emotional balance.
Learn to say no: Many parents feel pressured to accept invitations or to stay at a function until it’s over. Remember that you know your child best and dragging them to a place that’s uncomfortable or staying late despite warning signs of an impending meltdown isn’t in anyone’s best interest. Don’t hesitate to convey your regrets and be comfortable knowing that your decision is the best for everyone involved.
Take care of yourself: Most parents try to take on too much during the holidays and end up feeling exhausted and stressed. Your child will appreciate quality time with you much more than a new toy or home baked treat. And, you’ll enjoy the spirit of the holidays much more if you’re rested and replenished!