Helping your child get a good start to the semester
We talked to Dr. Morgan Beidleman, Director of REACH Learning Services, and Suzanne Smith, an Educational Clinician at REACH Learning Services, to learn how parents can help their students get a good start to the new semester.
How can parents help kids start off on the right foot this semester?
Dr. Beidleman: There’s usually a few months between the start of the semester and spring parent-teacher conferences. Parents shouldn’t wait for those conferences or the next round of grades to check in with their child’s teacher as it can lead to a surprise that may be difficult to rebound from before the end of the school year. If your child is in elementary school, and you suspect something is going on, or you're worried about their development in skills like reading and writing, schedule some time with their teacher early in the semester. Some helpful questions to ask that can help gauge what supports could be beneficial for your child include: "How is my child progressing since the last time we spoke?" "How does that compare to other kids that are in the intervention group?" and “How do you feel about where my child is right now?”
It can also be helpful to ask the teacher if they feel your child would benefit from additional outside resources. Share with the teacher what you are doing at home, and ask if there is anything they think you should add that would help.
"At what point should we have a conversation about if my child would benefit from an evaluation?” is the final question that I recommend parents ask. Asking this directly puts it on everyone's radar and provides a midpoint if your child hasn't made strong enough progress by conferences.
Suzanne: In this day in age of remote and hybrid learning, I think it’s helpful for parents to familiarize themselves with their students’ learning management systems, like Google Classroom or Schoology. For a secondary student, it can also be beneficial for parents to prepare for resistance when it comes to executive functioning supports that focus on areas like planning, organizing, focusing and self-regulation. Teenagers are developmentally geared to seek independence and it can be a challenge for parents to figure out how to be supportive without being intrusive. Establishing open communication with your teen and providing support for executive functioning skills are two ways that parents can help teens. It's all about figuring out how independent your student can be with things like organization and planning and consciously stepping back so they take responsibility.
How can parents support children in goal setting?
Dr. Beidleman: When it comes to planning and goal setting, at the start of a semester a lot of parents say things like, “This semester, you are going to get all As and Bs." While these big goals make sense, there can be a disconnect with how children and teens process them. The planning and executive functioning of a middle or high schooler ranges from two days to six days. This means that they are only able to plan for a few days or a week – not an entire semester. To support kids in reaching those big end-of-semester goals, we should focus on weekly or even daily check-ins and provide some type of celebration for their efforts during the week. Supporting kids within their current development phase helps them make progress towards longer-range goals.
Something else that’s important – particularly for teens – is to have them set their goals or participate in the process and then to support them in a non-judgmental way. Teenagers are ready for adults to come in and tell them how to fix things or what to do. At REACH, we tell the kids who work with us, "Your goal is our goal." If their goal is to get a C, our goal is to help them get that C. Often, when kids feel their goals are respected and they are supported, they will change their goals. We also check in with students once they achieve their goal and ask how they feel about reaching the goal and if they want to adjust the goal. Many times, a student will aim even higher than the initial goal. Being non-judgmental and using incremental changes can catapult change over the long term.
Suzanne: Something I think parents can do to help their secondary students is to build a vision that the student really owns. Often, this can be done by going out into the community. For example, if you think that your child's vision is to attend a university, then, if possible, take your child and go and have lunch on a college campus. If your child is interested in engineering, take a stroll around a campus like Colorado School of Mines and help them build a full and rich vision of their own goal. This way, when they're working hard in their classes, they can connect it to a real goal that has texture.
How does planning differ for neurodiverse children?
Suzanne: I think creating a good fit for each child is particularly important for planning. As I plan sessions with REACH students, I am mindful of the ideal lesson length and transition shifts that work best for each student. If they struggle with transitions (like changing subjects from literacy to math), we make mini-transitions that maintain the student’s attention and allow them to experience success in transitioning.
Planning should include not only the explicit curriculum but also "hidden curriculum" moments, too. Having small, teachable real-life moments allows students to move naturally from one thing to the next. It’s also important to include executive functioning and social-emotional hidden lessons and respond to teachable moments in those areas. Knowing a student’s preferred and non-preferred activities and subjects and being mindful of how much time that student is asked to engage in a non-preferred activity is helpful too. When I work with a neurodiverse client, I don’t typically lead with a subject that isn’t a preferred activity. Instead, I'll start with something that's not as challenging for the student. I will also try to end the session with a preferred activity so a student experiences the success and joy of learning, which is sometimes lost when they do not have individualized instruction.
Dr. Beidleman: People have a tendency to focus on a student’s struggle – whether that’s with math, reading or executive functioning. When we focus on the subject matter struggle, we ignore the fact that children’s brains are also coding that experience and that it has an emotional component. Learning, in general, goes through the same neuropathways as physical pain and joy. So, from a neurological standpoint, those look very similar on a brain scan. Any time your child is learning something, they are learning the actual skill as well as encoding an emotional experience. So, we should think about how we can help kids develop these skills positively, or at least as neutrally as possible. It’s particularly helpful with neurodiverse kids to start with a small dose of something and build up over time.
What type of planning checklist should be created to achieve semester goals?
Suzanne: Semester goals need to be the students' goals, so we must make sure we're working towards those. At REACH, we develop mini-goals achievable in a short period so that the student can begin to experience success with learning again. Those mini-goals are made to build into semester-long goals.
Dr. Beidleman: First of all, while I think academics are certainly important, I also think we tend to overemphasize those academic pieces – particularly when a student is struggling. It’s important to acknowledge that a student is much more than their academic achievements. I prefer to look at planning through a wider lens and ask kids questions that relate to their whole life such as, “How can I live an integrated life?” “What do I want to achieve?” “What do I want my goals to be?” and “How do I want to care for my body?”
One thing that we’ve seen both elementary and secondary school children have success with is a pie chart. In each piece of the pie, they write little goals or wants and when they've accomplished that thing, they color the piece. Depending on the child, the items could be as simple as eating two vegetables in one day, going for a walk with the dog, or playing 30 minutes of video games and reading from a comic book. They can also add academic assignments like learning spelling words or completing a math assignment. The pie helps the child understand the idea of a more integrated life.
It’s also important for parents to understand that students will likely have both peaks and valleys as they progress. We tend to think of progress as linear, which it is not, and it’s certainly not for neurodiverse learners. If their learning doesn’t happen in a straight line, that’s not necessarily a reason for concern. What you want to see is a general trending upward line over time.
Here is a sample of what a pie chart of weekly goals could look like for your child. Use this as inspiration for your own personalized pie chart and observe the changes you see in your child.
